Mumbai Rant

People say you never forget your first day at work. For me, it was my first day at my first work. I was officially in the Biotechnology industry. After 7 years of education - Masters in Biotechnology followed by an MBA, I was certainly itching to get going at work. Being placed from campus was a high. The only painful bit being; having to leave home. Moving to a new place, without a friend in the place. Well, almost no friend. I had a very good pal, although a bit far away from where I was going to be put up at. As of this point in time, I have already met a few people, whom I gladly call friends.

Bangalore wasn't much of a culture shock. So, yes, I'm at Biocon. Anyhoo, I'm at Koramangala, supposedly one of the most happening places in Bangalore. Although a far cry from good ol' Bombay (Mumbai), I'm beginning to warm up to the place. That Forum mall is nearby, is a big relief.

A few weeks in Bangalore though, made me realise what a unique place on earth Bombay is. It's a maddening city and so often, it's seemed to me to have no heart. I've read somewhere that we could judge the character of a city by how it treats its weakest people. Mumbai doesn't score very high on those counts. A reader's digest survey, rated Mumbai as one of the rudest cities in the world. That may well be true, if you consider the fact that what Mumbaiities know about civic sense and ettiquette, one can stick in a fly's ear.

But heck, you can't write the city off. I have no doubt God loves this insane city. It's a land of bewildering paradoxes. Someone who's just moved to Mumbai might be flummoxed - one sees posh apartments, luxury cars and just when one's getting used to the show of indulgence, one sees sprawling poverty. Huts, kids running about and filth. How do the twain meet? The thing is - they hardly do. Indifference is a way of life here. Whether it is to the suffering of the poor or corruption or injustice. Bribes are routine and euphemistically referred to as chai-paani kharcha. Sab kuch chalta hai. Adjust karo..

Yet, in Mumbai, people can make an enterprise out of anything. You walk down the road and break your shoe, there's a cobbler 'round the corner. You can't get into your own home; no problemo, for there's a chaabiwala who'll do it for you. Cooks to cook, maids to clean, and you'll get a rickshaw to get you from point A to point B; even if the said point A and point B are only a spitting distance away - in minimum fare. And no rant on Mumbai would be complete, without mentioning its legendary local trains. People curse the trains; but these serpent-elephant locomotives transport almost the entire city in a single day. Mumbaiites call the local trains as the lifeline. One day without them and the city will be brought down to its knees. In these trains, folks become travel buddies, complete strangers share their life-stories and resting your weary self down on a fourth seat is no minor feat.

People ask me if Mumbai's like this big melting pot. It's not. New York may be a melting pot, where people lose their identities and blend into the background. Mumbai, in Shashi Tharoor's words, is more like a thali, where people of diverse and varied cultures, somehow manage to retain their distinct identities.

It's a mad city. Oh, it's raving mad. And though I find myself gravitating towards New Bombay (Navi Mumbai) increasingly, I wax eloquent about my Mumbai, when someone asks; and even when they don't ask. Jeez, who would've thought I'd miss cheesy Hindi film songs. This post was to be titled, 'My first day at work' but after all this, it wouldn't fly. So, Mumbai rant it is..

For all it's crazy contradictions, I puff up and stand my full 5 feet 4 and a half inches, when I say I'm from Mumbai. Like I said, God loves this insane city. He died and rose again for its people too and yours truly is one of them.