By now, you've heard the Will Smith slap loud and clear in your living room and replayed to stirring emotional effect.
It might be odd to sympathize with the aggressor here, when he is so clearly in the wrong. A misguided stream of support in the aftermath lauded him for defending his wife's honour. A man so relinquished of self-control is weak and defeated, hidden beneath the picture - perfect veneer.
I say this as a Will Smith fan - I can rap along to the fresh prince of Bel-Air (just say the word), need no background to watch one of his movies (plot and storyline not mandatory) - and until revelations of his wrecked personal life, thought of him as a loving husband and father, stellar as a person, and exemplary as a professional. A secular testament to the virtues of plain hard work, grounded values, rooted upbringing, and integrity - rising up through access to 'common grace'.
Yet, my heart went out to this man. A desperately broken, wounded, and lonely man. Betrayed, tormented, not knowing which way to turn. No consolation in his accolades, no relief in entertainment, no rest in his thoughts.
To a greater or lesser extent, we all know this pain, or will know it soon. I did.
The remedy offered by the world can range from a therapy-laced exploration of the dark recesses of the mind, or a 'revenge is a dish best served cold' battlecry, or a shrinking from people, profession, and pursuit.
We are either held back by the pain of hurtful deeds said and done to us, or are driven in a quest to prove those wrong; our hearts a frothing of rage and tremors.
The blessing of a still, calm heart, without the whirling turbulence of thoughts characteristic of the aching heart, cannot be overstated.
If you thought this bleak narrative was building up to a solution, I have none. Except to begin with recognizing that because modern culture elevates how we feel as of greater value above everything and everyone else, it can be difficult to surface from those immersive waters.
With that recognition, what do you do next? This is hard and non-intuitive - but might we stop chasing happiness as the ultimate goal? That means acknowledging that life may not go your way, your goals may not be met, your timelines never achieved, and your feelings never adequately protected.
What if ambition looked like a life of quiet pursuit of spiritual disciplines, inward resilience through the means of sustenance established by God, and a determination to not strive without consulting God in the smallest affairs of life?
I'm not a great example, but afflictions have kept me humble. As much as I want the winter to end and walk into sunshine, my need keeps me clinging to God.
If not God, who. If not to Him, where.
